Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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