If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
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