a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
