is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
