All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
