My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
