Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
