so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
