SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
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