as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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