bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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