pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
