I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
