He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
