Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
