elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
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