yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
