Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Randomize
