we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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