I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
