Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
