i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize