sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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