thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
