Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
