God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Randomize