I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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