Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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