That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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