She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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