lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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