do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
