honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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