new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
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