none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Randomize
