If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
