I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
