No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Houston, we have a squirter
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
