i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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