I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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