but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
