he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
