i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize