my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
