if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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