dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Randomize
