Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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