I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
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