Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
i've created a new STD.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
