____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Less talking, more tequila
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
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